Celebrating Manners

Today is Emily Post's birthday. She has certainly been a social hero of mine, not just because we have the same name, but because she is largely responsible for the popularity of manners in American society. William Wilberforce was responsible for revitalizing British society, and I think it's safe to say that Post had a hand in cultivating it on our soil.

But we've come a long way from those days. I'm continually horrified at the lack of manners in our society. The area I now call home is full of very nice people, so I'm blessed in that regard. But as a whole, and the more I travel, the more I realize how uncivilized much of our society can appear. Just go to any sporting event if you doubt me.

In part, this can be attributed to a positive change in society. Once strict classes were somewhat dissolved, and there was no marked difference between upper middle class and upper class, things became less formal and people behaved by fewer rules. The positive here is that there aren't caste-like social strata in the U.S. like there used to be. Of course there's the rich and the rest of us, but nothing like it was even 60 years ago. We no longer need heavy guide books like Ms. Post's to even communicate with those well above our station. In fact, most wealthy and prominent figures today act about as low class as one could imagine (see: nearly every celebrity).

While the shift in America's social economy is nice, it is too bad we threw the baby out with the bathwater and rid ourselves of most formal rules of etiquette. Rather than viewing manners as posh and only for the fabulously wealthy, it should have been taught to the masses to promote a more civil and classy society, regardless of economic standing. But that's just my humble opinion.

Read more about Ms. Post and how truly classy she was here. And for an entertaining read on manners, its history and present status, I highly recommend Lynne Truss' Talk to the Hand: The Utter Bloody Rudeness of the World Today, or Six Good Reasons to Stay Home and Bolt the Door. It's a marvelous book, and probably funnier in audio book format. I've "heard" both her books and found them all the more engaging with her snobby English accent.